Thursday 21 March 2013
went back to Tampines recently, that explain my disappearance.
all those beautiful faded Memories seems to be Breathing again :')
or i should say, I'm finally able to be "me" again ..
those precious moment we used to had. Its all history now.
being moved and all,
i was all along blinded by a imaginary wall i constructed.
literally, throwing away diamonds keeping stones.
honestly, when i first get to see them after so long
i felt outcast. so distanced from them.
but luckily for me, their warmness always reach out to me :)
I'm truly blessed to be surrounded by them :) what more could i probably ask for ?
should really learn to be contented.
Anyway, like i said, i been back to Tampines.
had Sake Sushi with my family as planned to celebrate my brother acceptance to university.
high hopes for him , he had the potential. luckily, he always been on the right track :)
after having dinner, meet up with JiaSheng and Raven at SunPlaza park.
Charlie, Ding Yuan, Jeremy and Dilys joined us later on.
sadly, i still felt the distance between me and charlie .... .... its heartening.
sigh.
waited for ShaoXuan with Raven, JiaSheng and DingYuan
ShaoXuan came at 245am, did some catching up, talk till 4.
second day,wake up at 12.
ShaoXuan came my house. Seriously a best brother i could ask for.
given any circumstances, i can always count him :')
freak. why almost all my updates are rather mushy ?
anyway,
meet up with Raven, watched "warm bodies".
if you guys have no plans for March holidays, i would recommend this movie.
it's story its rather straightforward. i don't wanna be a spoiler.
so watch the movie yourself, thank me later :)
sadly, ShaoXuan had to leave early, meet up with the usual for dinner.
now, lets the photos do the talking alright ?
olds are golds, can't find any other perfect phrase to word it :')
love is the only feeling i have for them, nothing less.
unfortunately, it's gonna be a long time till my next visit.
you guys will be greatly missed.
and don't correct my grammar anymore alright? its embarrassing >.<
HAHA!
that's about it, thanks for visiting :)
flabbergasted by the facts.
how i wish i could hold you in under my arms :')
(in love with a goddess)
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Sunday 17 March 2013
Greetings,
been days since my last update isn't it?
if i counted correctly, should be approximately 6 days.
Anyway, nothing really interesting happen recently.
so this most probably should be a short post.
lets see..
I get my CA1 result back and I'm not satisfied. Truly disappointed.
even though i was sick throughout the examination,
and my friend tried to convince me, but being sick is not an excuse.
the amount you put in is the amount you receive, it's my fault to begin with.
let's make this failure a wake up call. shall start studying when school reopen.
2 day ago,
had a game of badminton with my school DM ( Disciplined master ).
with a couple friends, including JunWei, ZhiWen and Francis.
sadly, we were destroyed by him. but on the contrary, learn quite a few things.
lesson of life can come in many forms. true indeed.
later on, after an hour or so. We when KFC for lunch and followed by prawning.
i did not contribute to the catch but i contributed financially.
caught a total of 3 crayfish, one consider larger that the remaining two.
wasted $30 only for 1 hour of prawning. in my opinion, its a waste.
i guess i pulled my right forearm too in the game of badminton >.<
Even now, my hand is trembling. not vigorously just somehow moderately.
facing difficulties even lifting chopstick T.T
hopefully i will recover soon, the pain isn't tormenting but rather irritating.
it's 2am right now.
before i turn in into the night.
i would like to make a dedication to a broken-hearted friend.
dear friend,
mostly likely you won't be reading this as you aren't a frequent visitor.
but nothing stopping me either :)
unfortunately, you and him broken off.
Honestly, i never imagine this would happen
or atleast not so early. No, don't get me wrong! I'm not cursing.
in my eyes, you are consider a " above- average" person.
you're charming by looks, tall and feminine.
Although some time you can't maintain your lady- like appearances.
but generally, you're fine :)
trust me, my judgement never needed to be question.
you could consider it's a lose for him,
i know, i can't force you. There's bond to be tingling feeling remain.
and by all means, i'm your nobody.
the main thing I'm saying trying to say to you is :
" no matter how hard the wind blow , how strong the rain pour. im here "
i know its kinda mushy but like the sentence, you can count on me :)
i may not be 24/7 free for you. but if possible i will try to make time for you.
i believe you will do the same to me, right ? hopefully :)
sadly, i can't guarantee you i can solve , but you don't have to face storm alone either.
honestly, i always regarded you as my little sister, even though you're bigger by months.
haha!
anyway, when life gives you lemon, you made lemonade :)
i hope you will get over soon , i want to see the happy "rectum" on your feet again.
i guess , that's about it :)
stay strong, be strong and you are strong :)
sincerely, WeiJie ( only preferred by you )
lastly, thanks for visiting :)
(in love with a goddess)
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Tuesday 12 March 2013
Greetings,
there's a lot of things happened recently.
Even thought i only been back a few days after my disappearance.
Truthfully tired from all this nonsensical occurrence that been thrown at me.
been 5 days and I'm already drenches, mentally and physically.
a friend ask me today: "hey, are you alright? you look moody."
i asked her not to worry, but something she said melted me.
"even thou you are moody in the past, you tend to cover with a smile ... so what happened? "
sincerely I'm touched. touched by her concerns.
the feeling of concern by someone had longed been forgotten since primary 3.
but even the strongest man has their weakest moment. i am no exception.
i tend to wear a "smile" even when I'm in a dire situation.
there's a saying : "everything has a happy ending. if it isn't happy, it's not the end."
a pitiful self-relieved i gave myself. pitiful indeed.
but now, things seem to crumble me easily.
i no longer have the strength to even fake a smile.
everything seems so grey and black.
how i wish i could show a little weakness , without criticism from others.
life is never easy for me. Always have a way to knock me down. hard.
times and times again i showed resilience. bouncing back up.
i guess this may be the reason i grown.
this is not the life i ordered. cursing and swearing won't change a thing.
"it's better to light a candle than curse the darkness."
initiative plays the biggest part.
i must find the strength within me once again.
come on! you slain the dragon once. twice won't prove much of a challenge right?
Eugene, you can do it!
putting everything a side, 'N' Level should be my biggest concern right now.
nothing else matter.
i might be a little less socialize this few days, i need spaces to let loose.
to clear the thunderstorm in my clouded head.
just saying to those that regarded me as friend, who actually concern me.
not to worry ~
sorry to get emotional on recent post.
but blogging seem to be able to loosen me , allow me to feel a little better :')
that's about it. thanks for Visiting :)
(in love with a goddess)
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Monday 11 March 2013
Greetings.
I know i blog a little early today, it's only 6:16 pm.
But there's a flame building inside me that i would like to rant about.
or simply vent about.
reached school early today, 30 mins before the morning assembly.
same as always, i don't know whether it's a blessing or a curse.
there's one new anonymous confessed to me, again.
now there's 5.
i know, people would consider it a blessing.
Yes, I'm grateful for the facts that i have quite a number of suitor, truthfully.
but seriously? what's the good in me ?
I'm a social outcast, ill- tempered (currently I'm trying to tame it), short
ugly and the list continue.
think about it, there's a lot better guys out there.
why me? adding on i have long determine my heart to a girl not months but years,
what make you think I'm easily crumble.
sigh. i really don't know what to do ... ... confused.
but ultimately i doesn't intent to hurt anyone. i know how i feels to be rejected.
i know and once shared the pain, considering myself experiencing a couple times.
so please, liking me will only end up nowhere but in the face of rejection.
i will not give up on the girl i like, no. or rather Love for years because of some anonymous.
even though anonymous was right. i do have a heart made of stone.
this is me, and I'm proud of it. i believe my faithfulness level is not easily achievable.
respect me for that.
this the end of the first part of the rant.
like always, minding my own business in school. trying not to get any attention.
stay in the shadow. but no matter how hard i try or tried.
there's always, and i do mean always! people find stuff to criticise me.
this time, the word they used is "arrogant."
seriously? me arrogant? haha. you're making me laugh.
i don't understand.
i responded friendly to others, never stare, never judge, never back stab anyone
and most of all, i never place myself above others.
so what gives other the reason to call me arrogant ?
you know there's a different between arrogant and confidence.
so you think I'm confident? if i am, would i still be socially awkward ?
honestly, even thought i doesn't show it.
words like that crumble me on the inside.
there's a phrase i could relate, it goes like this :" beneath the confidence, doubt creeps"
i ever truly see the good in me, i don't even know whether could i even accept myself.
and words like that doesn't help at all.
sigh. like i say this world is just too cruel. predator or the prey.
anyways, thanks for reading my pitiful rant or consider a vent.
thanks for visiting. :)
(in love with a goddess)
Monday, March 11, 2013
Monday, March 11, 2013
Saturday 9 March 2013
Greetings,
seems like I'm blogging much frequently :)
it's a good thing, but won't hold that thoughts for long.
missed out 2 weeks of school, the amount of work accumulated could kill.
but luckily for me, i always does my homework before hand
so this shouldn't prove to much of a challenge to me :)
did some catching up with my friends, I'm glad that I'm not forgotten.
but, the attention i get is really ... overwhelming >.<
everyone that know me and saw me , goes like :
"Hey, you're back! what happen uh ? "
HAH! typical Singaporean ~
yes, i appreciate the concerns but not so much for the attention.
to those that greeted me on Friday, you have my gratitude.
sadly, some of my Brother in the clique have change ....
unfortunately, isn't changing for the better, instead for the worst.
clouded with arrogance.
not going to mention name.
lets see how things go. for now, i shall just play along :)
headed to class as there's no assembly, nothing seems to change.
miscalculated, literally astonished by my class
they made this for me:
because i came back early than it's done >.< (the reason behind the blanks)
seriously bewildered and truthfully touched :')
for the facts that i doesn't really communicate well with my classmate
other then my Clique, i spent most of the time sitting alone at the back of class.
always presume that I'm like a duck in a chicken's coop, the spare tire.
i never truly felt connected to the class ... ...
come to think about it, there's only a handful I'm actually comfortable with.
blame it one my solitary attitude ~
sigh, next week onward will be a rough .
won't be able to use computer throughout weekdays, a rule i set myself :)
fighting for my 'N' , fight for my future.
pay first , play later.
Shallow motivation, i give to myself ~
that's about it, ending the night with a lullaby, sang by Andrew Gracia:
Enjoy ? thanks me later :x HAHAH!
anyway, thanks for visiting :)
this feeling is unlike any other i ever felt before.
(in love with a goddess)
Saturday, March 09, 2013
Saturday, March 09, 2013
Thursday 7 March 2013
Greetings,
I'm back. Seems like i have a lot of free time lately
rather that idling , why not putting effort into reliving my blog ?
I'm actually quite satisfy with the current result.
my effort of breathing life into my blog really paid off.
Proud of myself :) aiming to have reach 75 post by the end of this year.
currently i only updated 16 post. including this, 17.
hopefully i will end up triumph,
updating once or twice a week, should be more than sufficient.
anyway , back the topic. this time like always, I'm gonna be truly honest.
this might sound pretty thick-skin. haters gonna hate.
but i believe currently there's three known girl having affection for me.
seriously. I'm rather sensitive.
i tend to look behind phrases. trying to depict any hidden meaning.
yes, I'm paranoid. everything is a conspiracy to me, there's always hidden agenda.
cry me river.
and yes, i can clearly differentiate between concerns and affections.
don't know whether should consider this as a blessing or the other way round.
first, I'm truly grateful. with my given personality, to be fond by others
should only happen when pigs can fly.
but please, by a means. don't expect a wanted responses from me.
secondly, I'm no good person either. don't ask why, its a fact.
furthermore , i longed have an apple in my eyes :)
Like i said, I'm Grateful, but i don't deserve any of this.
no hate or despise on the girls that showing affection toward me.
just voicing out that dilemma i had within me.
Frankly speaking, i don't see the good in me anyway...
I'm average-looking( considering the fact that i still have suitor ),
Short, academically considered bad for an Asian ( still have passes though ).
technically speaking, I'm consider below average.
so if you are one of those girls and reading this, don't waste your time alright?
find someone better, there's tons out there. A lot better ~
Hah. i felt like a jerk after this ... ... but anyway, its the truth. so I'm publishing it :3
that's about it, I'm dead tired. somehow only mentally is drenched this time round.
going school tomorrow, been off schedule since last Monday.
That's all, goodbye ~ and thanks for visiting :)
video of Music video of the week:
quote of the day:
" A bird in the hand is worth the two in the bushes "
I love you Rachel Ong, and the flame will never die." <3
(in love with a goddess)
Thursday, March 07, 2013
Thursday, March 07, 2013
Tuesday 5 March 2013
Hello,
Like i said, i will try to update regularly. most likely once or twice a week
so i guess i fulfill the promises i previously made ? :)
Anyway, i just discharge from hospital this afternoon, reason ?
sorry, i don't let my personal information fly around.
believe it or not, i often consider myself an overly "reserved" kind of person.
i never truly revel any personal difficulties or weaknesses to anyone, literally.
not that i doesn't trust those people around me or anything similar.
but instead, i felt that this world is just too vicious.
people take advantages from others weaknesses and strings them like puppets
let alone those that you call "friends" just a few day of communication
worst. Those that befriend you with strings attached , having a motive.
take me for instance, i regard myself as a easy going person :)
i forgive and forget, never take grudges. i take friendship seriously.
but before i open myself to others , i will do my studies.
trust me, gathering those info its a lot easier than you think.
Internet is vasts and dangerous. people tend to loosen them self online than in reality.
using this gathered intelligence as my arsenal. thus, if i was ever stabbed.
those traitor will suffer even more.
HAH! sound like i'm making this up ? you can try me :)
but words for words , i means no harm to anyone.
i only uses that method for inevitable circumstances.
i believe this is only for self defense purposes.
Anyway, back to main. sorry for drifting off.
discharge this Morning, tried to have luncheon with my "Brothers" in Tampines.
sadly, its a fruitless attempt. they were busy.
i don't blamed them. isn't their fault in the first place.
my time and their time crushed so yea, its fated.
so i made my way back to Yishun around noon ? late afternoon i presume
can't really pin-point the exact timing, i'm having a stuffy head right now >.<
played some Computer games, bath and eat dinner.
that's about it ? yup. that's all. nothing special ~
come to think about it , i never place my crush's photo on my blog.
fearing that she might or someone close might sees it.
i guess i'm gonna take the first step, fear isn't gonna change anything.
facing fear there's two option : 1) let it crumble you 2) fight it and change for the better .
so, for the very first time i'm letting this go, the fear that stringed me.
BOOM! this is her, my Crush. for 5 years now <3
My Pitiful attempt to drew her T.T
i did this when i'm confine in bed. i know i screw up.
but i believe it's sincerity that counts.
being confine to bed for three days, neither dreadful nor enjoyable.
i did a lot of self reflection, trying to make a differences.
looking at things i ever encounter in a different angle.
trying to lift this gloomy cloud that suffocated my mentally drenched head .
frankly, i did sees the light, i know what i want. and i found the needed motivation too :)
I'm not gonna wait for miracle to happen, i'm going to make it happen.
going to try confessing to her by this year, most probably late September.
hopefully, it will turn out the way i wanted :) wishes me luck!
things i learned :
never make things complicated. you want you ask , you doesn't you tell.
simple. but why are we, ourself are making things so hard ? Empathy ?
HAH! you are you , make a difference .
go and write your story ~
lastly, thanks for visiting :)
(in love with a goddess)
Tuesday, March 05, 2013
Tuesday, March 05, 2013
